Loneliness

If you're feeling lonely, you can change how you think about your situation and take action to improve your social support.

You don't need to be physically isolated to feel lonely. You may feel lonely if you:

• have less social contact or fewer close relationships than you'd like
• are separated from your support networks
• have feelings of social anxiety or find it hard to talk to people.

Loneliness can cause people to experience feelings of sadness, anger or helplessness. Over time, they may feel depressed or anxious, question their self-worth or think their situation will never improve.

What can I do?

If you're feeling lonely, these strategies may help you view your situation differently and improve your social support networks.

Challenge how you view yourself

If you often tell yourself "I am lonely" it can start to shape your actions and how you view yourself. Challenging this label and the associated thoughts can help you break the loneliness cycle.

Take the time to think about your overall life, achievements and experiences, and try to identify and reinforce more positive ways of viewing yourself. To help you do this, write down possible descriptions of yourself (including "I am lonely"), and list reasons that challenge any negative descriptions you have written down.

Notice your thoughts

Pay specific attention to what you are thinking or saying to yourself. When you notice unhelpful thoughts, you can either challenge them or recognise that they are only words and images. This can help you focus on reality and regain control of your thoughts.

To help you process unhelpful thoughts and stop them impacting your daily life, you can try:

• setting aside a particular time each day to work through worrying thoughts and feelings
• keeping a journal to write down your daily thoughts and experiences.

Don't compare yourself to others

Sometimes people have good social support but still feel lonely when they compare themselves to other people who appear to have more social contact.

Think realistically about your own situation, the relationships you have and your social needs. You may find you have a lot of quality social contact already.

Connect with new people

Look for opportunities to meet new people at work or university, online, through your hobbies and interests, or in other social situations.

You may feel anxious about doing this, but it gets easier with practice. To get started, try setting a small social goal. You can expand your goals as you gain more confidence. You could try:

• saying hello to someone new
• taking an interest in other people – ask them questions about themselves or their interests
• inviting a new friend out or accepting an invitation from someone else.

Live your life

Keep doing things that you find fun and meaningful, whether you do them by yourself or with others.

Having hobbies, pursuing your goals and trying new things will help stimulate your mind and reduce the impact of lonely thoughts. Physical activity, getting good sleep and eating healthy are also good for your brain and your mood.